Stand off.

Confusion. Citizens armed with a feeling of duty, spurned by an unclear injustice, and standing against the phalanx of black-clad intimidators. Their shouts are loud, but the message mixed. So many with so little, wanting to be a part of so much. To see first hand, however, the dark shadow of authority, with their coordinated movements and militarized stance, it is a frightening feeling to be fearful of one's protectors.

home[in]stead

The steadfast rhythm of a heartbeat unafraid. Wrapped in the security of arms entwined, the vulnerable breathes easy. Assured of the grand scheme, yet unsure of the particulars, the general motion is utterly positive, knowing full well the direction of the future. With such a weight relieved, which of the many advantages of this freedom will be advantaged first? It doesn't matter. There is an atmosphere to breathe, and a place to build a home; all that is necessary for lasting happiness.

Wor{ship}

Humbled before the altar of expression, I sit, mind outstretched in a penitent pose. Balanced on the razor's edge between knowledge and action, it is a seat of both comfort and danger. The gravity of procrastination will drag you down if you wait, cleaving one's idea from its source like flesh from bone. Such is the risk of idleness. Creativity demands attention, or its intensity will fade along with the frequency of its visits. One must keep the ship up and running, sails at the ready, for when that wind blows, it will take you to your destination and beyond.

A given thanks.

Serenity fills me, comforted by the meal of merriment. The leftovers of my memory smell and taste so delicious, I could reminisce for days. But I must go forward and do my best to let the experience of friendship and love live on through each new day.

This and every day

Love and Gratitude.

Hibernation

It's the season when the sun goes down so soon and leaves long lines of light along the land. The illuminating half light casts its sleepy rays, but the thin hue of gold does little to warm my chilly bones. Energy and excitement have flown south, and I'm left to walk within a world without wonder.

[you] n [I] ted

An exhaustion of emotion felt for the first time in a decade. The resonating ache of crumbling walls. It's a painful process, compromise. Breaking down and revealing vulnerability is necessary to progress to a stronger understanding, and though I feel drained by it all, I know it's worth it in the end.

Morning Air

The skies have cleared, clouds no longer weep their sorrow, and the cool, fresh air reminds me that I must get outside and enjoy life.

sleeping in

A cool blanket of clouds casts its gray across the horizon as I lay tucked inside my bed of silver linings. The comfort of a peaceful mind cradles my head like a pillow as my eyes drift in and out of focus. The world goes blurry and I pause, dipping back into subconsciousness. "Waking up" has never meant "stop dreaming."

Building Castles

Time flows into my hands and spills through the cracks between my fingers. Like grasping sand, I attempt to hold so tightly to something without definite form or shape. The arrogance of this futility, however, goes unnoticed by my self-awareness, choosing instead to think that I'm doing more good than harm. The reality is that time's intangibility is precisely the quality that makes it useful. Until I realize the extent of its abundance, I will not be able to see the beach for the sand.

A spoonful of sugar.

The disease of distraction can be the most pleasant of infections. Symptoms may vary from case to case, but procrastination is often the most insidious side effect. It comes with a false sense of security that "things will get done eventually." That may or may not come true, but up until the point of failure, it remains convinced of its ability to pull out a victory in the end. There isn't a magic bullet cure for this malady, rather, it's a long and arduous dosing regimen of hard, consistent work.

Target Acquired

A renewed sense of purpose surges through me like the shivering arc of lightning. In an instant, my outlook changes from amorphous to focused, as the constraints of a goal-oriented deadline make themselves apparent. While there is potential for something greater, this is ultimately only another exercise in defining my creative expression. Regardless of outcome, I must recognize this as another opportunity to learn more about my craft and grow as a writer. There is always another step to take.

Nodding Off

Emerging from this lethargic fantasy, this hope of constant sleep, I find myself weakened by the allure of forgetful sleep. While the plusses of reality are many, they are not without their drama. To exist as an observer on the astral plane, however, is to objectively see the quantum. The seduction of the conscious mind greets me with such affection that it is impossible not to take its hand and drown once more amidst the rising tide.

[Master] Number

A day of six or eight. Summations of date combine into intrinsic meaning, yet are slathered in projections of varying degree. Whether natural or a product of some artifice, such an occurrence has meaning to those who choose to recognize it as such. Such is the same with any other instance in life. Meaning is a choice, born from the irrationality of reaction and the dreams of expectation, and the more desired an outcome, the easier the psyche bends to accommodate that perception. Today will always be today, however special you decide to make it.

Tranquil Intentions

I close my eyes and look inside myself. Nothing is there. No thoughts rush to greet me, no emotions pull at my attention. My mind has emptied of all motivation, want and desire. It's the closest to Zen as I've been without flirting with apathy. Still, I'm concerned. While the opportunities for such a blank slate could be exciting, I feel no desire to create. I am at peace in this state of non-being. Naturally, I begin to look for explanation as to why I feel this way, as if it were a problem. I can see a path of reasoning here which would lead me to worry and anxiety, and refuse to explore it. I know I will move eventually, and at some point during the day be influenced into opinion, motion, or emotion, however, for the betterment of my person, I must stay mindful of my natural state of mind.

tight rope

The shadow of responsibility looms over my shoulder, an ever-present guest whose welcome has been overstayed. The wish for freedom, foolish in my mind's eye, longs for the days when consequence was optional. Such creativity blossomed in that sunlight, saturated by nourishing rays that knew no wrong. But such is life that those times give way to the present struggle: balancing the duties of man and the desires of child. A task made more difficult by the intertwining of these two into an artist's life.

focal points

The drift of the unfocused floats aloft the everyday, and soars even over dreams and desires. For in that fuzzy ring, that circle of confusion, simple goals are lost in an ever-blending haze. To relax within that weightless, imageless expanse is an inviting danger. Though necessary to recuperate valuable energies, the flow of that lazy river overwhelms with its tranquility; placation through relaxation. Stop to cool your heels, quench your thirst but move on. Perspective is not found herein.

5-7-5

she said, "write haikus" so i tried, but failed at it; they weren't exciting.

night rainger

The drowning hush of rain, so cooling in its cover, divulges drunken secrets late into the night. Awakening from the haze, soaking wet but refreshingly clean.

conspired desire

The remainder of reminders, the founder of the finders. The cognate comes with corpulence and manages the minders. A free man frames his friends for crimes they cannot have committed, as agents aim their arms against those whom they are pitted.

digestion

Exhausted, but accomplished. The nearly insurmountable task has been overcome, but at some expense. Both art and artist suffered, and though much greatness comes at the hands of limitations, this experiment in discovering process has uncovered the values of the upper and lower boundaries of comfort and constraint. The cycle shall repeat again, and the process will refine. All I can do is continue to feed the machine.

due date

An unheralded arrival. More morose and melancholy than expected, as the sheer weight of the remainder doubles its gravity. But somewhere inside that unwelcome fog hums the serenity and grace of acceptance. It has been an emotional experience, to say the least. No doubt that relief will come by day's end, and all this manufactured stress will have no choice but to leave. Until then, it's one foot in front of the other, as I finish the race amongst the mist.